Please do not take this too hard, but on reading this do you mind, you big oaf, We are trying to educate this girl thankyou We feel the need to enlighten you on a few points.

You humans, for reasons beyond our conjecture, seem to enjoy eating first one kind of food, then the other. This is unnatural. Once We Cats are used to one kind of food, we will continue to eat this food. When you substitute this food with another substance, you risk Our extreme displeasure.

Be that as it may, We take a healthy interest in all things edible, be they Cat, human or still motile. Speaking of which... The acquisition of motile food is an age-old tradition with Us Cats. It is essential that this tradition be preserved. Hence, we need to practice. We will practice on any target that presents itself, and expect you to do the same. We must admit that we have so far been unable to communicate this to you, despite the many examples we leave where you could easily find them if you only followed your noses.

Now if you'll excuse Us, we must get our human to tickle our tummy again, while our brother goes out to find something for under the pillow.

Yours,
Leo